Lord, let me be the instrument of Your Peace

Someone threw a baby down a rubbish chute at Toa Payoh last week, and my friend Stanli who was working at the call centre there took the call to open up the chute. The suspect is a early twenty something undergrad. Who says only 'delinquents' do this kinda stuff? Is unwed pregnancy something that only happens to those uneducated, or those who do not don corporate clothes? Sexual education and family planning was obviously not taught successfully to this girl.. Someone attempted suicide successfully in Tampines and his spouse and 2 young children were found dead in the flat. One was only 12, and the other was even younger, 4. Botakchin seemed quite upset about it. Who wouldn't? Should we just shrug it off like yesterday's news? A life gone is a life forever gone from this world.. Somehow, I am reminded of the grief when I heard the news that a PE teacher from my JC died of a heart attack when I was J2, and when a school mate of mine committed suicide last year. A lot of questions were asked.. they were fine people. I am also reminded of the grief during the Tsunami immediate aftermath. What are we doing about it now? Have we forgotten? Where was He that half day (Many will say that His Hand was covering in protection the survivors)? All those people that died.. What did they do to deserve that? Judgement does not come in this life itself, but at the end of it, when we stand before His throne.. However, there's no sense in all these dying! But, life ain't an obeying animal. This is the comment I wrote to his post: questions that will never be answered until we meet the Man Himself will include "Where was He during the tsunami?" and "What was He thinking when He allowed the suicide attempt of so-and-so?".. Just as He does not control our actions, He does not control over others' actions. You should know.. we all have the freedom of action and will, and we all choose to do one or another action. Who made what decision that led to what action that caused grief to another.. where's God in this equation? He's only around if someone in this equation asked Him something. He did not make us mindless blind zealous worshippers (sometimes I question the wisdom of giving us 'intelligence') but He allowed us the right to choose. This, from the Man who made the Universe, if you believe the bible. None of us will know what went through the minds of Simon and his family, nor those of the red-string deaths (sometimes last year, a woman committed suicide, and her 2 young children were tied to her, wrist to wrist with red strings), nor that of the depressed LTA engineer, nor those of anyone who caused 'illogical' death to anyone... Why did they do it? will a reason be good enough to compensate the shock that we get? But how long can this fickle minded public remember them? We are all but hypocrites, everyone of us. Sometimes I think.. it may be kinder to have taken away the children.. for they are special in God's eyes.. perhaps they are having a much better life up there now.. It's all a belief, all a gamble.. and you choose your odds.. From what He has done in my life, I know which end I'm trying to lean towards. The bible has many passages to deal with things that cause people to think about suicide. Anger, Poverty, a broken spirit, grief.. If one could just look inside.. turn to Him for strength.. Perhaps many things wouldn't happen. Funny how in times of good we don't point to Him for credit.. but only when we find no one to sufficiently blame for. Is the blaming the subconscious effort to believe in someone? Remember Job.. God allowed the devil to test him, but He kept Job close to His heart. He never failed Job.. God doesn't 'give away' His children like that! If a loving human father could not give his children away as pawn, how much a loving Father from heaven? [Luke 11:11~13] Perhaps if we all took more effort to know and help the people around us.. ask not what they can do for us but what we can do for them.. not easy, but it may be a better world in the future.. at least those we've helped have benefitted. If we have all been honest with our spouses, stern but loving with the children, open with our friends, soul-baring to our family.. God treats every soul as His own, even the numbers of hair on our head are numbered. Every hug of comfort is customised, and every obstacle is engineered to grow us.. If He could not bear to cause the death of His betraying disciple (Judas got guilty and committed suicide, Jesus could have told the disciples he was the betrayer and held him back so he could not betray Him), how could He have not grieved over these deaths? I can only pray that they are better off now. I guess only the Lord knows. Pray, brother, pray. Luke 15:10~32 (Parable of Lost Son) Almighty God, the great I am Immovable rock, omnipotent, powerful, awesome Lord Victorious Warrior, commanding King of Kings Mighty Conqueror, and the only time The only time I ever saw Him run is when He ran to me, took me in His arms held my head to His chest, said "my son's come home again" looked at my face, wiped the tears from my eyes with forgiveness in His voice he said "son, do you know I still love you?" it caught me by surprise, brought me to my knees when God ran the day I left home, I knew I had broken His heart I wondered then if things could ever be the same then one night, I remembered His love for me and down that dusty road ahead I could see and the only time, the only time I ever saw Him run May God bless everyone.