A billion people died on the news tonight/But not so many cried at the terrible sight/ Well mama said/
It's just make believe/You can't believe everything you see/ So baby close your eyes to the lullabies/On the news tonight

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Love, Selfishness and The Best Bet

Am listening to 爱情 by Karen Mok now.
若不是因为爱着你 怎么会夜深还没睡意 每个念头都关于你 我想你想你好想你
若不是因为爱着你 怎会有不安的情绪 每个莫名的日子里 每一个莫名的日子里 我想你想你好想你
爱是折磨人的东西 却又舍不得这样放弃 不停揣测你的心里 可有我姓名
爱是我唯一的秘密 让人心碎却又着迷 无论是用什么言语 只会只会思念你
若不是因为爱着你 怎会不经意就叹息 有种不完整的心情 爱你爱着你

Ever had that feeling that love is just absurd? A very close friend of mine just decided to go on in the decision to break up with the man she had once planned to marry. To her, it was heart-wrenching to see how he begged, in all his egomanic manhood, that he'll change. But she knew that inside her, they were plain incompatible.. she loved him.. but she felt that she had to move on. Is that considered a form of selfishness? Wouldn't her allowing him to hold on to a girl that have slowly lose faith in the relationship be more selfish? So what is selfishness? What is selflessness?

Another friend of mine told me that her ex broke up with her because he could not commit. So she moved on. He still liked her, she knew.. but she could not stay stagnant. Her not staying to a man who's not "hers" - selfish? or his refusal to give commitment and security selfishness?

爱不要停摆 - 张震岳

莫名的爱/一次又一次地占领我的心/曾经的绝望/不敢再去想/因为你的出现输了自己
我不敢要求/那会是一个什么样的故事/看著你的眼/幸福的感觉/希望你的出现可以永远
爱最好不要停摆/就算是一阵风/也要让它飘进我的心中/爱最好不要停摆/就算是一场梦/一直睡没有醒来的时候

This is what I want my love to be. Something that occupies me, but it doesn't equate to me losing my life. But I don't have to HAVE it.. at least not now. If it comes, good for me, if not.. btw.. I am those kind of girls that really hopes to remain pure platonic friends even if I do like you and/but know it's only one-sided or not possible. It have worked before so I can say for sure that if it doesn't, man, am I glad that I ain't with them. *grin*

On a separate note, I was thinking of "faith" today while trying to fulfil a short prayer request by a very good friend. It came into my mind, no doubt an attack (no matter how feeble) by the evil one. "What if there is no God?" "What if you're doing it all wrong?" "What did you've been taught wrong?"

Hey, old devil shmevil, I've thought of all these questions before.

And know what? the odds for Him being the Lord... I'll place my bet on that.

Don't trip on your way out.

ps I need to shape up.. spiritually, mentally, physically and career-ly! Drop pray and continue to encourage me. 3 weeks without a sale: Depressing. And I am NOT going to allow the old devil shmevil work on me again.

Comments on "Love, Selfishness and The Best Bet"

 

Anonymous Anonymous complained! (Saturday, September 10, 2005 11:28:00 pm) : 

Was here... thanks for sharing with me your blog. Will be 'floating' around here. So as you update, I'll be reading :)

 

post a comment

Neko