A billion people died on the news tonight/But not so many cried at the terrible sight/ Well mama said/
It's just make believe/You can't believe everything you see/ So baby close your eyes to the lullabies/On the news tonight

Saturday, February 26, 2005

What do you think?

You Are A Romantic Realist

You are more romantic than 40% of the population.You tend to be grounded when it comes to romance.Sure, you can fall hard... but only for someone you've gotten to know.And once you're in love, you can be a total romantic goofball...But you'd never admit it to your friends!

The Office Heretic

The Office Heretic



Dedicated to the Sardine Pack

Thanks boss...~

Summer Nights

I almost have forgotton how I love sitting in a car watching the semi-urban, semi-rural villages and towns go by... or the sprawling black canvas with the arrangement of bright sparkling stars with that moon with a smiling face, sending us on our way. The rubber and palm trees lined up in salute, lightly and softly swaying to the wind's persuasive caress. It does make me so peaceful and happy and oblivious to the turmoil around the world. I can sit there and watch forever.. almost. In fact, I was rather disappointed that we reached Ipoh so fast.

Met up with Sim and Khae there. Quite surprised to see Sim.. He's normally harder to find and even harder to pin down... Especially when he is attached. Even lagi surprising was that Nicky called me from KL one day. He said that he wanted to come out with Sim and Khae to Singapore. I really miss these fellas. They are the only people I can say that I sort of 'grown up' with. Fond memories of long talks at Chooi Fun's house, KFC @ Ocean, late night suppers at Wei Sek Kai as we got older.. Also of walks with Lum Lai Kuan and others, talking about life and everything under the sun, sky and moon. This time, Pei Pei and Chong came back also... With Kor and Jie and Andy and these two campers in Ireland and UK, it was really a joyous and happy reunion.. even if it was for one night only. The Gan family reached the next day. Pa and Ma spent up to the weekend there.. I think they really had fun. If I have money, I'll buy a nice house there, rent it to my cousins and leave a couple of rooms for us when we go back. I really love the urban-rural mix, the city with the kampong heart. Perhaps industrially it is a black hole at the moment, but then I love it. I am foreseeing eponential growth in the region.. and if Viktor's company does well, I will force a motion to KL and Ipoh. It is my dream I guess. But I hope Ipoh doesn't change... that much, especially its heart... or the side that is close to my heart. Awfully selfish, ain't I?

Last night the cab I was in nearly contacted with an indian chap in black tee and on a black bicycle in the middle of the one lane 10 metres or less from a right angle junction that we just turned in and absolutely did not see. How to...? VC said another close call. I get very tense nowadays when the car I'm in swerves suddenly. When Pa was driving to Ipoh, I kept waking up once the car swerved. I got so nervous. VC verdict was un-verdicted, but I can't help but have a nagging thought in my head. Though I do not study criminal law, but judging by the way cases are decided, it doesn't look good for him. There will be a verdict because of the cab driver: his insurance needs a verdict to back it up. This would be pursued. I cannot do much besides praying.

I was thinking of writing about my mock exam... But a million thoughts run through my head. Is it due to the lack of sleep or the overdose of coffee and sugar I had recently? I'm watching a million shows at once. Everytime I change the channel, my mood increasely swings with the sounds and images of the tube. Watching "Bringing out the dead" starring Nicholas Cage, and "Two weeks" and "Charlie Angels 2" and "Lost in translation" now. I really wanted to catch the first and the last, I watched Charlie Angels 2 with Samuel I think, and "Two Weeks" was a happy coincidence.

I wonder if romances like that happen in real life.
I identify with Sandra Bullock's character I guess. I really love working, I may moan and scream and groan and complain and stuff, but then I... I guess I like the way that I am useful around.. even for the unuseful stuff. Anyways it was a feel good movie. It was quite nicely done I think.

I wonder if I should get the soundtrack for Lost in Translation. The music seems good. Two weeks is good but it's mainly Norah Jones. Lost in Translation has good shots, a cinematography (did I spell that right?) that is strangely thought provoking. The female lead had a scene in which she gave up trying to do elaborate Japanese Flower Arrangement and sat in her hotel room listening to a discman instead. That shot was............. disturbing. I have no idea why. I've been watching some cartoon channels also. "My wife and kids" is so funny, by the Wayan Brothers, and the Justice League...

I'm going crazy over that song "Summer Nights".. have been hearing this song from Grease over and over. Not that I dislike my other songs, but I'm so............. *sigh*... hahaha~


I don't know what's wrong with me nowadays. I get pissed off with Westin easily. When I told him I had a short fuse that day, he was saying I always have a short fuse. Harlow, not the right thing to say at that time. I find myself tolerating him day by day, and I think it's time for us to draw some space. Perhaps being around each other too much can press on each other's nerves. My temper is really short.. especially nowadays.

The Sardine Room's 4 (that's Westin now.. not me. Jeremy and Westin and Albert and Mandy) is almost all sick. I was sitting on Clifford's space and I felt soooooooooo lonely hearing the laughter inside *laugh*. It was nice sitting next to Steph though, but I must confess that I'm so nervous around her! She's getting so big now, I'm so scared of bumping into her. Back to the Sardine Room.. they are almost all sick.. Jer and Westin and one more.. Can't remember if it's Mandy or Albert. When I told VC he was like "SHIT!" I must confess that I had quite a few laughs. It's gonna happen sooner or later. The pathetic size of the room (which is smaller than Irene or Yukiko's room) just accelerated it.

This blog was started on the 23rd Feb 12:52... Recently I have had this urge but no communication skill. What a nut, eh? What a dumbass, heh heh *laugh* I'm just a crazy idiot. Gonna change the time to now.

I am a mean bitch these days. Perhaps always have been.

Oh, go away.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Void - Humpback Oak

Jie is leaving for Shanghai as I write.. can't believe pa and ma didn't call me.. Now I'm alone at home while the whole family is at the airport.

Some things never change. Once a mis-fit, forever a mis-fit.

Perhaps everyone is a mis-fit, or all mis-fits fit in.. But I know I'm not. I feel lonely everywhere. I can't keep up the jokes in my family, I struggle to keep my temper at times with the boys, I find it really boring with my Bro/Sis-in-Christ at times.. of course, in all situations there have been good and touching moments.

But a mis-fit is still a mis-fit.

The words I say are heard by half in my family.. an improvement to not hearing it. I'm starting to be inclined to be silent again.. to just mind my business. Like what happened in Bistro.. The urge to just fade.. to just keep inside my shell and ignore everything. Keep my urge to argue and fight for my rights and such inside. Just swallow, shut up and ignore...

Feel my fuse short recently. Don't know if I can finish that report for Viktor, or the IP books, or the gatekeeping manual I've been putting off. At first I realised why I've been so moody, PMS.. saw blood just now. Been trying my best to tolerate, but the edge of irritation kept on rubbing the side of my cheek. Normally I'll calm down at this time, reflect. I am acutely aware of the hormonal moods I can be in, but this time.. Nearly snapped at Jarain just now. I don't know what for. I don't know what's up.

Think and feel I am pissing everyone off. Think some people who are irritated with me are just tahaning now... perhaps I will allow myself the luxury of the withdrawing into myself. Will try my best to shut up, sit down and work.. That's be a good rest. After all, that's what everyone wants from me anyways.

Think I'm going to sleep. Yes I know I haven't finished Viktor's report. I may just take MC for the afternoon tomorrow. Ignore ignore.. can I be the inconsiderate and selfish one for a go?

Thursday night class, friday night prayer night...

I am so tired.. who can understand this weary heart besides God?

I live on his grace and mercy and love and compassion..

Will write about the accident and my suayness before/during/after CNY... about my feelings in Ipoh.. etc etc etc.. All the good stuff.. haha.

Stressed Out - Humpback Oak

I started a post yesterday, put my laptop on hibernation, and just now it was still around.. then I hibernated again.. and then suddenly when I switched it on, it was gone..

Sort of remember what I wrote yesterday.. something about not knowing what to write.. then talking about when I can finish.. some illogical self-centered stuff.

Feeling really neurotic sometimes recently: feel my fuse very short. Hey brothers, if you're reading this: I appreciate jokes, teasing, but not being forced into a corner with very pointed jokes. Stop trying to pull me with every guy and say you're just joking cos it's very insulting and implying that I'm petty makes it worse: you know that you are overdoing it. You know who you are.

However, some people are quite nice and sensitive.. like VC who can joke and say I'm oversensitive.. haha.. and I'll just tell him that he's oversensitive to me being sensitive. And it's true: how ironic. The people who piss me off think I'm petty at being angry, those who genuinely make me laugh are worried I'll be angry.

Actually I get really really mad at sweeping discriminating jokes. I really hate general statements like "all women are like that" etc etc. Dom: I was really really using all the God-given self-control I had to not throw you out of my house. And yes, you CAN NOT make sexist remarks. Nor racist, nor any other sweeping remarks that you inconsiderately think is funny that is made at ANYONE's expense. But I still love you guys...

In short: don't make sweeping statements, don't judge if you have to without knowing and understanding it, and listen to yourself speak once in a while. You might just be surprised.

Thanks VC for cheering me up, and thanks Jarain, and thanks Mandy, and thanks Denise for all the stuff that you guys did. Even people like Chris (WLNY), Guangxing, MH etc..

I know this blog is far far away from the standard I have dreamt of.. the funny column style, yada yada.. but just today, just a tad too tired. Ain't going to check for spelling and grammar... Am told that there are spelling errors in my last post. Really don't wanna..

About the last post.. the aftermath.. the next time. All the other serious thinking thinking stuff.. next time next time.. haha.. really lousy english.

"Stressed out.. Seriously insane"

ps I'll probably amend this post in the near future so if you think it looks funny or incomplete or what, blame it on the amendment.


Saturday, February 05, 2005

On Hindsight

The time now is 0342H. I just reached home. The day started innocently enough.

I was late again, bad time management again. Then we went to tiong bahru plaza to have lunch and buy the stuff for May. At about 3 plus or 4 plus we celebrated her farewell.. she loved the montage. Then at 5.30 Mandy and I went to Westmall to buy a cake for VC's family.. We arrived for the steamboat at 7.30 roughly. Linus and Erica kept the team laughing. It was a good night.

I ended up with the team for drinks after that.. LL waited and became lethagic. I asked if he wanted to go home instead and he said ya.. owe him a tung lok dinner.

We went to Tango at Holland Village. The service was good, though slightly laggy, which was no fault of theirs.. I give credit where it is deserved.

Most of them ordered non-alcoholic drinks... The girls ordered non-alcoholic margaritas, and the boys (Uncle J and Hummingbert) ordered coffee. VC ordered Whisky Coke: I don't drink beer and he wouldn't let me escape this time.. Mike shared until his sister came, where they ordered one jug of beer.. Happy, VC also ordered one more jug of whisky coke.

We played "zhong ji mi ma", and VC lost a couple of times trying to 陷害 SL. We all had fun.

As we prepared to leave, travelling arrangements were made.. Mike and his sister went for a second round, SL walked home, the boys split a cab. I suggested Vonda and I share a cab.. and VC can drive Grace home.

VC suggested that Vonda and I sit in his car as well.. He'll send Grace, then Vonda, with me staying the nearest to his place being the last to get off so someone can keep him company as we were all tired.. we had a long day.

The little alcohol in me drove this insomnic to drowsiness, and VC tried to find his most upbeat music.. it turned out to be early jazz.. I told him "this is the kind of jazz I like" and then the aircon seduced me with the gentle rocking of the vehicle. I could not bear it.. the seat was welcoming.. I placed my head on the seatbelt like it was a lover's shoulder.. then slept in its embrace.

I remember vaguely waking up nearing Grace's house.. saw her get off the car... tried my best to fight sleep for once (insomnics don't have it easy).. but my willpower was no fight. I remember I turned and saw Vonda awake, so I went to sleep with a easier mind. After all, I have to be awake from Boon Lay to Jurong East.. looking forward to have conversation with VC.. zzz...

VC's shout of "shit!" woke me up.. the next thing I knew, we hit a vehicle on our right. I remember waking up before we hit the vehicle. We spun... I cannot remember what VC was saying.. he was turning the steering wheel rapidly. I think he was saying "oh shit oh shit oh shit" or something along that line. From either the first or second lane on the right, we spun to all the way to the left.. We hit the railing.. think we most probably spun again.. then we stopped.

VC was shocked.. he kept saying "bad" or "shit" or the such. All three of us got out. Vonda was shocked, and I was just speechless.. which is a very big deal. I can't remember if VC asked us if we were okay first inside or outside the car.

The other vehicle was a taxi, I think it was yellow. The driver and the passenger stood outside the cab and the cab driver was furious. He crossed the road, and I remember VC walked over down the road shoulder to meet him halfway. He kept apologising, and asked the cab driver not to report to the police. He promised to pay the driver, and continued to apologise. The cab driver noted the air of alcohol around VC. I turned to Vonda and asked her if she was ok, exchanging our version of events. We walked down to the two men, and saw that by then the passenger had crossed over.. He sat on the railing next to us. I think. I can't remember if VC talked to him after the cab driver asked him to apologise to him, or he had already spoken to

The cab was on the second lane to the right. There was shattered glass all over the fast lane. Some cars plainly slowed down to take a look.. I was rather irritated with them. Others slowed down to steer away from the broken vehicle and some drivers just drove over the glass. I remember wondering whether their tires would get punctured.

An ambulance was amongst the cars driving past, and before it reached us, it was on the lane that the cab was on. I pointed it out to Vonda and we had no inkling it was coming over to us. I just thought it was trying to force a turn so it could go on its way. When it stopped behind VC's vehicle, I thought that they were perhaps on their way to an accident and happened to see us. A few men got off and asked if we were alright. It dawned on me someone had informed the civil defense of the accident. They hang around for a while.

To my horror, many police bikes approached, but to my relief, none stopped. Perhaps some turned their heads for a look. I was thinking, surely this can just count as a civil case, just as long as the cab driver do not call the authorities. To the ignorant eye, this was just a normal accident.. 'seriousness' not withstanding.

That relief was shortlived.

A police pulled in front of VC's car, and 2 policemen, trying to be garang, put on their rudest attitude (if anyone can get more rude than that, he'll get a world record), and talked to us in a very pushy manner. "Who's the car driver? Who knock who? You drink and drive? Drive want to drive somemore!" I started to be in a state of fear, for fear that VC would be charged with drunk driving.

EMAS arrived behind the cab... started to get busy around it. What they were doing, I wasn't really sure. Perhaps some cleaning or such. A second police car also arrived. Which came first I don't remember.

The second car's men in blue were fierce, very business-like in fact, but they were considerably pleasant compared to the first car, at least they weren't rude. "Wah, you smell of alcohol! How much did you drink? Huh? A lot is it? You want to drink and drive! Disturb my sleep only!" (The last statement left the most lasting impression on me, I have no idea why.) VC apologised repeatedly, as he had done with their colleagues who had left.

I started praying, for VC to pass the breath test, for the police to be lenient with him... They told him to walk over to their police car, and Vonda and I stood there just watching them talk to him. I was thinking, what would I do if they cuffed him? I was at a loss. I held my cross and prayed that God would see him through this.. to tell the truth, I was afraid to pray that God would do His Will.. just in case.. foolish though, because His Will will be done.

We chatted with the passenger. He told us that this is the second time he's involved in an accident in a cab.. kept saying "it's me.. it's me."

Funny how almost everyone was blaming themselves.

I walked over to VC and stood by him, could see the air of... resignation? regret? No words were said about what we should have done earlier, besides apologies flying all around.

In the end, VC had to take the car with the ability to flash lights on its roof back while we sourced for drivers to pick up his car: his wife was asleep, and I was quite relieved. I would hate for her to be disturbed and still have to drive us back (They would insist).

In the end, Vonda called her brothers and they came down in a car, albeit late. Everyone stood around the road shoulder chatting. VC spoke to the seemingly more senior policeman while I observed the younger one. He seemed to be an NSF, or a rather young TP. (At the time of writing the blog, Jie's friend Leon came into mind. Any chance of this young TP being a scholar on practical training?) The policemen traded 'police' speak in front of us, the abbrevations flying here and there. The cab driver drove his car to the road shoulder (the EMAS had left a long time ago.. I forget when.) and I saw that his left front tyre was punctured. I can't remember the total injuries the car sustained, whether the windows were shattered or what.

Vonda's younger twin brothers came and she sat in her brothers' car while one of them drove VC's car with me as the map guide. I told VC to call me if anything, I was really worried for him. Exchanging conversation in the car with Vonda's brother, we noticed a weird sound coming from the right, beneath the hood. He explained that it was a mechanical damage, something (he said it specifically but I can't remember or did he?) was rubbing by the tyres.

We reached VC's house and I threw the keys into the letter box.. before realizing it was unlocked. They were about to manually lock each door while I just simply reached my hand into the letter box and took the keys. The keys returned to the letter box after the doors were locked.

The time is now 0013H, 8 Feb 05. It has taken me roughly 3 days to finish up to here. Sometimes I really didn't want to go through the facts. Sometimes I really just didn't have the strength to finish the blog.

On hindsight... If I didn't fall asleep, this whole event might not have happened. If I had been awake and keeping VC company, chatting with him, he wouldn't have dozed off at the wheel.

On hindsight... If I had followed my gut feelings of going coffee club express instead, we might not have gone to Tango. I suggested Tango because for some weird reason I thought it had quite a lot of non-alcoholic drinks (I was quite, quite wrong.).

On hindsight... If I had insisted to not drink, he might not have ordered Whisky Coke..

On hindsight... If I had gone out with LL, they might have just hung out at his place or just ordered beer together with Mike if they were out.

On hindsight... Thank God for the seatbelt...

I am very very tired now. Quite some stuff have happened prior to this end of the blog. Probably update next week. Being quite nua recently.

Part 2 of the crash - The aftermath.. next week.

Friday, February 04, 2005

Better is one day in His courts, than a thousand elsewhere..

you who have beautiful words, who lurk in the dark.. and surely you who have read Revelations know how it'll end... no matter how the world is reluctant to it.

I risk getting stoned by writing this at 1402H, but there are things I simply cannot agree with.
Yes, actually men and women are all made with the same pair of Hands, in the same Factory. However, we are all made with our own flaws.. my dell laptop screws up every 2 months, but my sister's (exactly the same model..) has never given her any trouble.

I have a belief that a person's upbringing and circumstances make a person. Of course, genetically we are all different.. somehow God has also made each one of us different. Else, how can one explain a pair of twins with the same friends, grow up in the same house, in the same classes and have the same DNA being so different?

As flawed as women are, men ain't an open source program. I find men harder to read than women.. and so are my male friends. To me, friends are unigender... so I cannot understand the fuss of having a close male friend. I risk being stoned by Westin, my buddy, but I think there are times I am more rational than him, even if rationality are supposed to be a 'trademark' of men.

Of course you've seen me when I'm extremely neurotic.. somehow, in here, I find myself abandoning all 'maturity' I have maintained and inbuilt through the 3 years of working. You cannot believe how hard it is to convince someone that a young chinese female can do a good job. I hate it when someone tells me, "why not ask your parents" or something like that. But surely my friends think the same way not!

Humans by nature are prideful.. surely the bible shows enough examples.. we have been programmed. Even adam was by nature a prideful man, and so was Eve.. So was Cain..
Why must humans seek to divide everything we see? By skin colour, by gender, by upbringing, by income, by rank, by looks, by height, by ability.. For order? Why can't we stop at the order then seek the heart from there? Will a malay love less than an indian? Will a man need to survive more than a woman? Would a tall man have more heart than a short one? Would a good looker have more good friends than one who's ugly?

Was pondering about why people use 'personality' as a gauge rather than looks.. surely, human made standards? But a person can seek to have a better temper, but cannot do much to that face of his he is born with (plastic surgery not withstanding)..

As the verse has it.. "Beauty is fleeting and charm is deceptive, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised!" (Proverbs 31:30)

I think man and woman are made for each other. We are made differently cos we are made to be compatible with each other.. not alike. Example: human's anatomy.

Genesis 2:24 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."
Matthew 19:5 "...[Jesus speaking] "‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’"


Matthew 19
11 Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word [of the disciples' question that not getting married was good], but only those to whom it has been given.
12 For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”

So nothing has been said about the incompatibilty of men and women.. after all, we are made of men's ribs:
Genesis 2:20b But for Adam no suitable helper was found.
21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh.
22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

See, woman is made to help man, but in the same way, woman was made because man could not survive alone. There's no 'who's more important' or 'who's more dominant' or 'who's has more rule'. For this, we are all made equal in His eyes. It is our soul and heart He yearns for.

Surely God could have made a woman anew, like He made man.. but I think He did this for a purpose... We are alike, but not the same. I'll let you ponder about it.

Last words: when a man and a woman come in union in the Lord's Name, living their lives for Him, surely, in this God-centered relationship He would give many blessings!

ps(1) This started again as a comment to a friend's post. Chill, VC~ Many blessings and my prayers with you. Should any of my 'reasonings' be wrong, anyone, please, comment on it and let me know.
ps(2) Dehua has recovered and is home resting now. Thank God, and praise His Name!

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Game For Blues

*laugh* I am simply bored and provoked into searching for 'Humpback Oak' when I remembered Botak Chin. haha~ that is really your picture..
I wonder if people using pens are a niche lot nowadays, besides those pen-users who have them free (meaning: FOC from office, wouldn't use it if they could).. could that explain the total lack of advertisements?? But then, it must be a sunset industry.. people rather give thumbdrives and pdas now as gift rather (one too many rahters) than a nice good pen and a nice good notebook. I remember having difficulty looking for nice nice ones cos I just couldn't find a nice fit. I must have 10 over note books in my drawer.. all written halfways.
On the topic of new gagdets, I wonder if the term 'notebook' for a portable computer is due to people realising a 'laptop' burns the legs of someone. I must be an idiot: I actually enjoy the warmth.
I think I am getting old. This is bad. I am getting increasing resistant to new technologies, my learning curve is constant now (very slow, very very slow) and my reaction is very very delayed. I can't think in a straight line anymore. I think my excuse of 'brain not working after 5pm' cannot be used anymore... today I just sprouted nonsense in front of Faye. I am such an idiot.

HalO! My best score was when I played with mike, desmond and annie and actually won the game for the first time. Of course, annie and desmond were busy.. *laugh* he was teaching her how to play. I think I took advantage of that, I kept fragging him haha. But the best part was I won mike.. yapee! *laugh* well.. today played extra shitty. Was at the bottom with 5 frags.. that's FIVE... VC had a wonderful time of asking what went wrong.. yes sir I would like to know too. Need to untrain myself to unrely on radar. After that we played with radar and I realised I was sort of confused haha. The more I play in a row I get slightly better, but that's no excuse.

Have a team dinner this friday. Steamboat at VC's house.. he wants to treat us the whole amount. Quite touched *sob* but nah, I'll stop being a pirate. Hopefully after that go listen to Blue Note with LL.. if not I'll just hang out with the team at a 'coffee that sells beer' house. I got a feeling Mike's gonna complain his 'Man's Night' is ruined.

Keep forgetting what I have on friday night. Another aging point. Think I'll start staring at my Clie every 10 mins now.. if I remember. I don't stare at it enough in the first place, only when I'm bored or I've got work to do on it. I almost agreed to 3 events happening on the same day.

Talking about Man's Night.. feel kinda sad that Clifford is leaving. He's such a nice guy.. at least based on my experiences. Short exposure time, but hey, if you're nice, you're nice. Actually the CSMs are mainly nice people.. but my first good experience with them was when I assigned this agreement that didn't need to be assigned, and they asked me who passed it to me. In my distant memory I was super sure it was Clifford. Horror to my horrors I realised upon checking my records that it was me who took it and just assigned it. Act smart, but realised I'm very stupid and have always been and might always will be. When I told them, they weren't angry but Clifford was like, "You! 50 star jumps now!" in a mocking manner and if I wasn't so relieved I might have thought it was for real.

I have a million thoughts running through my head, but I don't seem to want to put them down, and some I can't seem to catch.. don't know when or where I'll stop.. those that I don't wanna seem to be.. about my studies, about a certain man, about going for drinks with mike, VC and clif and that irritating brown shirt man (too tired to be 激动), about walking off that certain man last night.. about too many stuff.

This is where I get bored/irritated/confused/uncertain of what to say.

Oh, by the way, this started out as a comment to a friend's blog. Don't know if he wants me to tag it though, so I'm not doing that yet. However the more I wrote, the more I felt that I was writing my own. *laugh*

Irritating bitch.. I mean me.. haha~

on a seperate note: Dehua has got dengue. Please pray.. I thought it'll be better soon (well, I always get 'good', 'recovered' from the brothers and sisters (it'll be good if they are truly honest with what's in their life.. it's really sucky when they tell me fine then announce that they had a really tough time, like I ain't 'spiritual' or good enough to know.. bleah.) and then I get news that his liver is swelling. God, this man wants to be so close to Y ou, but please, not yet. I know I ain't in any position to demand or even request, but I know You love us so. And it is written that if we ask anything in Your Name, with faith like a mustard seed, it'll come through. God, please.. just lay Your hands on him and take away his sickness like a wind out to the sea. Use him greatly and this sickness and its healness towards to the salvation of his family.
I have that faith of a mustard seed.. and I know, surely, he'll be healed.
Let Your Will be done! Amen.